Nobody is perfect. Our work is always going to have some problem or issue or blemish. But that is what feedback is for. If you work with someone and are at school or office setting, somebody is always going to going to give you criticism.
The first thing you should remember is criticism is not a bad thing. Good criticism breaks you down so it can build you up. The perspective you should have is this: criticism is only part of the process, helping you improve upon your work.
But it is not always easy to emulate that mindset. So, here are some tips that will help you deal with negative criticism.
It is easy to twist negative criticism as a criticism against yourself. But it is crucial to remember that it is not a personal attack. The person is not critiquing some deep-seated flaw in your being. Someone’s negative criticism is not a reflection of their opinion on you–it is of your work.
It does not help you or your work when you respond emotionally to any criticism. Approaching it positively and rationally can help you see the flaws in your process or final product and help you do better the next time.
The difference between harmful and constructive criticism is fundamental: one is mean-spirited, the other is not.
Harmful criticism, most often, is passive-aggressive, a personal attack, and either comes out of a place of spite or jealousy. They don’t like you, so they’re going to be immature and rude about it. Harmful criticism usually focuses on the flaws of your work and is relentlessly negative. It does not tell you how to improve upon your work.
And, therein lies the difference.
Constructive criticism tells you where you went wrong, yes, but it will also tell you how to improve upon it. Someone giving you constructive criticism will be but not rude. Usually, the person will also highlight the good things you did. It mixes the positive with the negative to ensure you don’t feel bad.
You can tell what is constructive criticism through tone and content because it provides actionable insights. It is always a good idea to ask clarifying questions to get more feedback. By the end, you should have a concrete plan on how to proceed to the next step.
Someone giving you good criticism, as a general rule, knows what they are talking about. And a large part of accepting criticism is rolling with the punches and making the necessary changes. A majority of the time, you will find that it makes your work better. It also shows your teammates and your employees you are flexible, adaptable, and accountable for your mistakes. Additionally, it also helps build character (how else are you supposed to grow?) In the case it doesn’t, this is the time to stand up for yourself and assert your skills and experiences (How do you do that? Well, that’s for another time, folks.)
When someone gives you effective criticism, they are taking time out of their day to help with your work. Saying “thank you” is the polite thing to do. It also makes you appear as a positive person with integrity and steel, making more people want to work with you.
Well, that is all. These are all the things that you can do to get better at accepting criticism. You will get better at it. It is not always going to be this difficult, we promise!
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